You know, funny story: There’s this craft store called Michaels. Look, my sister knits, and she goes to Michaels. So my sister called me and she’s like, “Oh my god, I’m at Michaels, picking up yarn. You have a poster at Michaels.” I’m like, “What?” She’s like, “There’s a poster, there’s a Falcon poster at Michaels.” I’m like, “Holy s**t!” She’s like, “I’m gonna come and pick you up, and we’re gonna see your poster in this store.” So she picks me up and we go to Michaels.

We go in, and I see the poster and I’m like, “Oh, this is….” She’s like, “I know, I know.” I said, “I’m gonna sign these posters.” I was like, “That would be amazing, you buy a poster and it’s like, actually signed by the Falcon.” Like, it would blow my mind. So I go to the front, I buy a Sharpie, I run back to the back of the store. And she’s like, “I’m gonna take a picture of you signing it.”

I’m in this store and I’m signing all the posters. The manager comes out, he’s like, “Hey, whatcha doing?” I was like, “Oh man, I’m signing these posters so when people buy ‘em, they’re signed.” He’s like, “Well, people are not gonna buy ‘em if they’re signed.” And I was like, “No, no, no, it’s cool. I’m pretty sure there won’t be a problem.” And he goes, “Yeah, but it is gonna be a problem, you’re messin’ up my inventory.” And I’m like, “No, my man, trust me. I mean, I’m the Falcon, that’s me!” And he goes, “Yeah, right. You’re gonna buy those posters.” I said, “What?” He’s like, “You’re gonna buy all those posters or I’m gonna call the police.”

He rolls up all the posters and goes to the front of the store. And I had to buy like 60 Falcon posters that I signed in Michaels.

-Anthony Mackie getting in trouble for signing his posters at a Micheals  (x) 

Anthony Mackie is a gift to all mankind. 

(via bartdontlie)

(Source: fwips)

Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could; some blunders and absurdities have crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day.

Ralph Waldo Emerson (via serialchillin)

(Source: littlefootlove)

Bro 1: bro let's get matching anchor tattoos

Bro 2: why bro?

Bro 1: so our broship doesn't float away

Bro 2: bro..

Ort was also the first to correctly estimate the distance between the Sun from the center of our galaxy. That’s a big deal, finding out where we are in the Milky Way. 

(Source: alwaysmoneyinthebnanastand)

Only in America can you be pro-death penalty, pro-war, pro-unmanned drone bombs, pro-nuclear weapons, pro-guns, pro-torture, pro-land mines, and still call yourself ‘pro-life.’

John Fugelsang   (via fawun)

(Source: ichbindeinesylvia)

pinkperv:

drvalkyrie:

pupmutt:

Please watch this

I SAW THIS EPISODE AS A KID AND NO ONE BELIEVED ME WHEN I TOLD THEM ABOUT IT.

HIS FACE

LMAO

(Source: cnuculator)

kierongillen:

boyfriendhook:

In which Jaime required coffee in order to sit through the wedding vows. [x]

OMFG BEST MISTAKE EVER

Can’t get over this.

Lol!!!

(Source: maimedlion)

duhmayo:

baruchobramowitz:

"Hello Professor,

I am doing my best to make this email sound adult. I have rewritten it sixteen, wait… seventeen, times. I am requesting assistance.

Thank you,
Student”

"Student,

ok

-bill”

yo seriously

arrestedwesteros:

Narrator: And although the intervention didn’t work…it turned into one of the Bluth family’s better parties.
Spring Breakout - 2x17

arrestedwesteros:

Narrator: And although the intervention didn’t work…it turned into one of the Bluth family’s better parties.

Spring Breakout - 2x17